Well it's been a week since the ultrasound. I'm still waiting to hear from my doctor's office to discuss setting up the needle biopsy and the breast health clinic appointment. I'm not really concerned though. If it looked really super suspicious, the biopsy would have been done right away. I've gone through the stages of the whole thing from stunned, to worried to sad to angry. I think I'm in an angry/resolved to accept whatever happens stage. I decided I didn't sign up for this mess. It's not acceptable and I want nothing to do with it. It's not really a denial stage because it's coming in my thoughts as anger and not if it isn't seen, it doesn't exist sort of denial. I will still have the biopsy and follow the plan, whatever it may be. There might not be any need to have a plan other than going back every 6 months for the mammogram follow-ups. I wonder if the next time they will check both breasts since they caught the cyst in the right breast "by mistake" since it wasn't even the breast being checked. It just got in the way. It is what it is. I decided I'm just too busy and too tired to worry about it anymore. I suppose I'm still worrying but I am trying to throw it to the back of the dung heap to ignore it as much as possible.

I am really wiped this week. I think it had to do with the flu shot and the reality that summer is over and it's going to start getting cold and the sun is setting earlier each night. I will miss getting out of work in the sunlight. The whole thing just makes me what to hibernate. I'm not sure if that is what my body is trying to do and I've got too much going on. Being wiped did slow me down in work but not by much.

I'm planning my first programming series. It's Family Movie Sundays. It's a series that they have been doing for a few years. It was something that they have passed onto me. I will be designing my flyers or using last year's template. Not sure yet what I want to do. The first movie is in December and it goes until May. It has to be newer movies too which should be fun to try to get since I have tried to reserve some of the movies and I'm 164th on the list for one movie....lol.

I found out that with the Reading Readiness I will be reading at least one story on a concept each time the program happens. I think that is like every other week. I need to start working on that too.

I hope I don't disappoint them now that I am starting to get more responsibilities. I am afraid that I will not do things right. It's that perfectionist in me that I keep trying to break and just tell myself that I am doing the best I can but my standards for me are just so high still especially with a new job. I don't want them to regret their decision to hire me especially with my quirky ways.

I'm probably just tired and that's why all these little things are running through my mind and go figure, giving me a headache.

I wish I was back on vacation!